BE INTENTIONAL
The stories that clients have lived bring to mind the function and
dysfunction of how they got to this place and time. From the hoarder
to the overwhelmed young parents, clients have needed a new way
to do things. Many times, this means addressing the problem and
then setting up a system that works for the individual.
As we grow and change through various stages of life, our needs and
wants change. How you did schoolwork is (probably) not how you
do office work in the workplace, or how you were parented is not
how you parent today. How we get stuck is when we resist change
and fail to find a new way that works for everyone involved. Think of
this stage of life we are in currently as a new opportunity to change
what is not working for us. Do a quick evaluation of what is not
working for yourself in your work or at home, and then realize there is
a new way of doing everything; try something new, and keep what
makes your life function serenely and easily.
Many years ago, I heard someone say to their teenager, “don’t waste an empty step”, and what they meant was that walking around looking for something to do does not get the job done. Finding yourself making a ton of lists, but nothing gets done is never going to accomplish the goal. If you see something that needs to be relocated, grab it and take it there. You do not need a list or an app to do so. It does not matter if you think that it’s not your job; lend a hand and keep the order of the place. Doing the little work now will pay off in huge results later. We can be in the mindset of “preparation for what is next, or always trying to keep up”, and choosing the latter is frustrating and expensive.
For parents heading into back-to-school season, structure can make daily routines much easier. A simple routine helps prevent the chaos of waking up late, rushing to work and school, and not knowing where anything is. Putting things back where they belong means you can find them the next time you need them. When we fail to plan, we often start the day unsure of what we need or what to do next. Prepare tonight for tomorrow in ways that set the day up for success. Lay out your clothes, and your children’s clothes, the night before so there is one less decision to make in the morning. Finish basic housekeeping before the weekend so you have more time for family, hobbies, or entertainment. Plan meals for the week, perhaps on Sunday evening, so the days run more smoothly. Decide which meals will be eaten at home and when you plan to eat out. Make a grocery list and do any simple prep for the week ahead. This helps prevent relying on fast food or eating out simply because it is convenient. You might set a rhythm such as home-cooked meals on Mondays, Mexican food on Tuesdays, salads on Wednesdays, Italian food on Thursdays, and fish on Fridays. Once you plan a month of meals, you can repeat the plan easily. The goal is to remove as much mental work as possible before the busiest part of the day begins.
Picking up children from school, getting them to practice, and finishing your workday is already stressful enough without also deciding what is for dinner. Plan ahead, and the decision is already made for you.
No different from how you would expect an office or workspace to operate, your home can be as efficient. Ownership is not just one parent trying to think and do for a family of four or five, but delegating ownership to everyone makes for success. If you’re alive, you will eat and have laundry; make a system that makes those jobs as easy as possible.
If you need a new system, think about what would make problem areas work better, ask for help, and don’t be afraid to try something new, it might just be the best thing you have done for yourself in a long time.
—Lori
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